Your dreams are on the other side of your fears!

I went out yesterday evening for an essential errand and I was overcome with emotion. The bus driver had the front portion of the bus blocked so all passengers entered through the back door. I was the only one on the bus and I looked around at the quiet streets, earlier as I walked by strangers, I could sense their fear, sadness, and apprehension. I smiled, made eye contact and greeted those that seemed to want to connect some-how. I thought my city, my neighbours, filled with fear over this pandemic and a sadness unlike one I have felt for a while overcame me.

As I mentioned to one of my closest friends the irony of this pandemic is this virus prevents us from experiencing an essential human need – human connection. Babies that are born and are not held can die without human touch and connection. In fact, nurses are encouraged to hold infants and touch them when families are not available. Here this virus prevents us from coming into close proximity with one another, even those we dearly love. Yet in this situation, it is loving to stay away from those that are most vulnerable and stay away from large groups, etc.

Fear, as you can appreciate today more than ever, can be paralyzing. It can prevent us from reaching our hopes and dreams. Do you know how amazingly brave you are? Think of when you were a small child, you had fears and back then they seemed monumental. Yet at some point, you overcome those fears and realized they held you back from seeing the world differently.

What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of heights? Afraid of dogs? What do you avoid and how do you inconvenience yourself and live differently based on this fear? I assure you that more energy is spent on avoiding situations where you will encounter your fear than actually viewing your fear from a different perspective.

To illustrate I used to be terrified of heights. This was the result of a friend playing a prank on me and thinking it was funny to hang off a balcony as I screamed. Well, that did it. In my early twenties after that I could not go near a balcony railing, was nervous of tall bridges as if I had been hanging from that balcony! After over a decade of being fearful of heights, I grew tired of being afraid. I decided to go parasailing and in front of a boatload of people I screamed as the winds blew me like a kite back and forth in this swing over the ocean. I was lowered down and was so immensely pleased I had survived Ha! Ha! I had overcome my fear enough to enjoy the scenery and the drink that awaited me below.

A few years later I was approached by a colleague to ask if I was interested in skydiving. It had been a goal of mine to put this fear of heights finally to rest. This would be the ultimate challenge, jumping out of a plane 13,000ft and leaving my fear in the skies. Off we went. Both my colleagues were super encouraging, and my only stipulation was that I not be the last to jump out of the plane. That would be too scary. Well, guess what happened? The universe or my guardian angel thought it would be a hilarious joke to have Samantha and her awesome instructor go last. I see both gentlemen, my lovely colleagues jump, and I am left behind. I turn to my instructor and say, “do we really need to do this?” Before I could answer we are doing a summersault (not at all anticipated) out of the plane and I let out a chilling scream. Then I realize how silly it is to have my eyes closed when I had always wanted to fly in the clouds like a bird. I open my eyes and am overcome with the view. I begin to laugh and cheer as my photographer/videographer comes into view to capture my joy and excitement. I will share one thing that happens to you once you skydive, you literally realize there is really nothing you cannot do if you set your mind to it. You have just jumped out of a plane! It gave me confidence and the ability to enjoy life like I had not experienced before. My fear was much more harmful and set me back from my dream of flying like a bird. Today I am no longer afraid of heights. If I ever get that similar feeling of fear in my belly, I remind myself I am the same soul that jumped out of a plane at 13,000ft.

So, what are you afraid of? How does that hold you back? What joy are you preventing yourself from experiencing by being fearful of what may happen? For example, what about that special person in your life you have been wanting to get to know? Perhaps you have been friends for years and even talked about who you each date, and now and then you sense this twinge of chemistry. Fear of losing that person or the friendship holds you back from what can be a beautiful pivot into a new way of interacting with this special person! What is the worst thing that can happen if you were to speak your truth? If they tell you they are interested too and willing to take things to another level fabulous! Enjoy. If they tell you that they don’t feel the same way, then it allows you to open your heart and mind to other opportunities and people you may have never noticed were interested in you. Life is magical that way. The universe is abundant and if not that person, then someone even more delightful will cross your path.

Maybe your fear is pursuing your dream of having your own business. How many times have I spoken to people in my coaching practice that are gifted with a skill they call a hobby or side gig? They are terrified of giving up their full-time position that is secure to pursue what sets their heart ablaze! Sadly, our situation today highlights how it is very few jobs that are truly secure. How many today are facing layoffs, shortened shifts or total industry shutdowns due to the pandemic? Imagine dedicating decades to a career you disliked and now having to reinvent yourself. Your dreams, your skills, your gifts are innate and travel with you through the ups and downs of life. If you play an instrument you can teach it. There are so many things you can do if you believe in yourself and your abilities. Your dreams are truly on the other side of your fears.

If you dream of starting your own business maybe with the coming incentives, you can do just that! Dream beautiful souls, dream. It is something no one can take away from us.

I send you all so much love.

Samantha